Soo, This Kid's the Man, Right?

I'll admit it's a slow work day today. The Eagles game got pushed back to Tuesday night, a fantasy championship is now all but guaranteed for my Triple Rainbows, and the 7 or 8 people who were thinking of coming to work today decided to bag it because their cars can't handle 2 inches of snow. It's gotten so bad that I had to take a break from my Netflix Watch Instantly queue; my remaining options are Radio & Tom and Jerry Meet Sherlock Holmes (which is sounding increasingly awesome the more I consider it). Thank God my attention was diverted to our ninja friend above. It's a little long, but worth your time for at least 3 reasons:

• When's the last time you saw a technically trained ninja in a full-on sweatsuit?! This guy clearly means business and takes shit from no one. Even Steven Seagal grabbed his ankles for Hollywood when he was forced to wear 'normal-person' clothes for Under Siege 2 and every other shitty movie and tv show he's made since.
• @1:48--This was originally going to be Scorpion's finishing move in Mortal Kombat, but the designers decided against it because they knew it would be too hard to execute in real life...until now
• @5:05--Never has anyone in the history of the martial arts attempted a "Dragon Twister" combo right into a "Bull Charge". In fact, I'm getting nervous just writing about it for fear of retaliation.

Unbelievably, our star asks for "really good criticism" at the end of this tutorial. Let me be the first to say that this was a flawless performance and the only thing that would turn this Fail into a Success would be if the protective sleeve on his sword came off and somehow managed to chop off his ponytail...but now we're just splitting hairs